My pet frog broke his leg this morning...he is very unhoppy.

Did you hear about the watchmaker who is half Spanish and half Irish? His name is Juan O'Clock.

The only thing I really have planned for today is to get my new glasses. Then I'll see what happens.

I just found out my toaster wasn't waterproof. I was shocked.

I don't mean to brag, but...cashiers are always checking me out.

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Do you wonder?

1. Why doesn't glue stick to its bottle?

2. Can you cry under water?

3. Why don't birds fall off trees when they sleep?

4. Why is it called 'building' when it is already 'built'?

5. When they say dog food is new & improved, who tastes it?

6. If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

7. Why does round pizza come in a square box?

8. Do fishes ever get thirsty?

9. Since there is a rule that states "i" before "e" except after "c", wouldn't "science" be spelled wrong?

10. Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?

11. Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light?

12. If mummies are from Egypt, then where are daddies from?

13. Why does night fall but never break & day break but never fall?

14. Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?

15. Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?

16. If a brown cow eats green grass why is it's milk white?

17. If a giraffe had a sore throat, how many lozenges would it need to make it better?

18. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

19. If a turtle does not have a shell on, is he homeless or naked?

20. If a vegetarian is someone who eats vegetables, what does that make a humanitarian?